Top 25 Opening Themes for Fall 2012

Perhaps it's more due to the expectations I had assigned to the fall season after such a fruitful spring session, but I had high hopes that we'd get some creative approaches to the openers this season. Overall, while I think the music itself has gotten easier on the ear and catchier in the brain, I'm finding myself sighing more after the first ninety seconds of the episode.

I'm uncertain if it is due to the content of the shows. Long-distance hikes such as Space Brothers and Gintama' have resigned themselves to glancing out the window and appreciating the scenery, while shows granted a second season such as Sword Art Online and Medaka Box are sleepwalking, plenty satisfied with their content keeping the viewer's interest. Outside of the eternally-enjoyable Polar Bear Café and the Jojo's Bizarre Adventure remake, all of the shows in the Top 10 are first-time appearances.

The decent shows have managed to make ripples, but I can guarantee you this: the bad shows sank like shrapnel. You won't see To-Love-Ru Darkness and Girls und Panzer in these rankings, but you will see a show I wish we could scrub from the collective fanbase's memory, only for its incredible failure. I'm sure you've already guessed by now.

With that, I give you the hardest rankings I've ever had to sit through—the Top 25 opening themes of Fall 2012.

(Clicking the title of the song will bring you to the YouTube'd OP; clicking the artist will bring you to their PV for the song.)

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[Anime Survivor 2] Final: Binbôgami Ga! vs. Humanity Has Declined

It is the spectacle, the enamoring uncertainty, which lurks in Survivor that has made it last for such a long time. All of the competitors are so unknown that first glances do no good at predicting a winner. The weak may be able to outsmart the strong, the strong may be able to out-muscle the weak, and those in the middle may end up victorious due to both eating each other in the process.

That apparently isn't the case with Anime Survivor. If anything, this was more a Lord of the Flies approach to survival, the weak constantly getting picked off each week, while the strong survived due to momentum (the strength of previous episodes) or genetics (how well the staff had performed in other shows). Those shows that had a bad premise didn't stand a chance at making it to the final round, while those with weak plot lines were exposed in the middle of a feeble season.

Really, Anime Survivor was a miserable idea I came up with. Better than BTOOOM!, perhaps, but certainly worse than Battle Royale.

And that leaves us two shows that many predicted would have legs this past summer. It was all between Natsuyuki Rendezvous, Binbôgami Ga!, and Humanity Has Declined (Jinrui wa Suitai Shimashita, or hashtagged as #Jintai) from the starting gate, and while shows like Kokoro Connect and Moyashimon Returns pulled hammies halfway through the race, these three showed staying power. That is, until Natsuyuki Rendezvous displayed one of the weaker dramatic endings and collapsed yards from the finish line.

So which show—Binbôgami Ga! or Humanity Has Declined—wins in this photo finish in the last ever failed Anime Survivor experiment? Well, let's just say that the cameras weren't required for the end.

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Ixion Saga DT: The Trollingest OP Ever?

Kid plays video game. Kid entranced by a virtual heroine coming onto him. Kid "falls" into the video game to become a true warrior, eventually thwarting his clever enemy by punting him in the junk with a spiked boot.

Before you laugh at this premise behind Ixion Saga DT and call it immature, perhaps you should follow the lyrics to the actual song. Go ahead and access Crunchyroll to follow the opening theme, "DT Suteru" ("I'll lose my DT") by Golden Ixion Bomber DT. Go ahead. I can wait. Just be sure to note that our hero is swinging a sword that turns into a thick-tipped giant hammer when he holds it juuuuust right.

Getting a little bit of a hint that there's something trolling under the surface of this sub-standard adventure anime? Maybe the lyrics might give you a hint. Just be aware that the underlined lyrics were what was written on the screen, while the lyrics underneath are the actual sung song.


「戦士の称号」捨てる                 I will give up my title as a knight!
ＤＴ捨てる                                     I will lose my DT!

僕に戦士の称号捨てさせてよ       Let me lose my knightly title.
僕に「ＤＴ］捨てさせてよ           Let me lose my DT.

普通の男に戻りたいな                   I want to become a regular guy again.
おとこになりたいな                         I want to become a man.

とても悲願しい運命                        My extremely long-cherished fate
とてもかなしいたからもの              My extremely woeful treasure

宿敵に返上したい                          I will return that to my enemy.
きみにささげたい                            I will give it all to you.

次元転移したときから　強く引力れ合い  Since the time I jumped dimensions, I've felt a strong pull
であったときから　強くひかれ合い          Since the time I met you, I've felt a strong attraction,

眠るたび悪夢をみた                      And when I sleep, I have nightmares.
眠るたびゆめをみた                      And when I sleep, I dream.

ハイペリオンの覚醒にうなされてしまうよ         I've groaned in my sleep from my awaking Hyperion.
からだのほてりにうなされてしまうよ                 I've groaned in my sleep from my body's warmth.

オーラの冷まし方をおしえて         Tell me how to calm my aura.
ねつの冷まし方をおしえて            Tell me how to cool my heat.

どうしてだろう　宿敵と対決すれば対決するほどに    Why is it that the more I fight with my enemy,
どうしてだろう　きみをしればしるほどに                      Why is it that the more I know about you,

僕はもう　アルマギアが戦闘状態になる         the more I'm thrust into Armagia's open warfare?
僕はもう　あいつがかたくなる                          the more that part of me gets so hard?

僕に戦士の称号捨てさせてよ         Let me lose my knightly title.
僕に「ＤＴ］捨てさせてよ             Let me lose my DT.

主君の右腕と決別さ                        This is goodbye to my master's right-hand man.
みぎてとさよならさ                           This is goodbye to my right hand.

ライバル同士で戦おう　決着は      Let us fight as equal rivals. The conclusion to it all...
ふたりでしよう　これからは             Let us do this together. And from now on...

宿敵を逃さない                                 I will not overlook my enemy.
きみをはなさない                              I will not let you go.

宿敵と対戦しかない                         I can only fight my enemy.
きみとはなれない                             I can never leave you.

Can you perhaps guess what "DT" means then? (Check below.) Well, considering the main villain (whose initials "ED" could now stand for "erectile dysfunction") basically had his balls literally busted by the hero, I think you can tell.

* DT = "doutei", the Japanese word for "virginity".

Top 25 Ending Themes for Summer 2012

To tell the truth, part of me didn't want to do these rankings. I honestly never made it as far as the ending theme in some shows (Dakara Boku wa H ga Dekinai, Ebiten), so it's required some forced research. That may be why some shows fell through the cracks this season, but in all honesty I'm rating the OPs higher than the EDs this summer. There was just part of me that appreciated the beginning of some shows instead of their ending.

What did I see a lot of? Scrolling. Miles and miles of top-to-bottom scrolling that probably didn't need to be done. Hey, I suppose it beats "running shots" by a mile, but at least five shows tried that pan.

What didn't I see a lot of? Good endings. Apart from the Top 5, a good season may have left a lot of these endings off the chart. I suppose the producers were as sleepy as we all were this summer.

So let's get on with it already. Here are your Top 25 EDs of Summer 2012. Cuddle up to them and get some good Z's.

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[Anime Survivor 2] 3rd Place - Natsuyuki Rendezvous

Let's make this short and sweet before the shine is gone, folks. I'm going to hate myself for this review miles more than you might.

I had convinced myself that we had a sure thoroughbred this season once we saw what the moe train wrecks had wrought. No matter how many times Tori got punched in the crotch, no matter how many lingerie shots Campione! gave us, no matter how many ping-pong balls got eaten by Chinatsu's hair in Yuru Yuri...we were doomed to have a long, hot season of anime that we would forget once the first episode of Robotic;Notes was screened.

I'm just stunned that noitaminA would royally let us down. The wide-open net was there. All they had to do was nudge the ball through, but Moyashimon Returns shanked the kick, missed completely with its complete change of character profiles and drab storylines from the first season. The second show clanged their shot off the crossbar in the 90th minute. (Pardon the soccer metaphor—finally saw the US National Team win!)

Considering the severe letdown, I really shouldn't devote much time to this review. Third place in Summer 2012's Anime Survivor is Natsuyuki Rendezvous.

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[Anime Survivor 2] 4th Place - Kokoro Connect (Blogger Random)

Yes, "Freaky Friday" was called "Fortune Cookie" in Japan.

We've seen this formula before, back when Lindsey Lohan wasn't a druggie and both Judge Nelson and Fred Savage were still inexplicably popular. The whole "body switch" thing. I mean, it's not so foreign a concept, and manga such as Your & My Secret already beat other shows to the punch. Hell, even off-the-wall comedies such as Excel Saga and Binbôgami Ga! gave it a shot.

But if the human body can be treated like a vehicle, why stop at just changing drivers? Why not see what happens if someone resets all the radio stations or puts diesel in an unleaded-only tank?

That's the concept behind the 4th Place...

Excuse me.

Hello to all of you people reading this blog. I hope you don't mind, but I've decided to involve myself. You all know me as "Heartseed", the real star of Kokoro Connect.

I noticed recently that the person who writes this electronic mumbo-jumbo doesn't have all that much to provide for fandom. His biases against harem shows are crimes against humanity at times, and he's grumpier than Clint Eastwood at an Ikea. He thought that Nobuna Oda show was worse than that show with the chrome-plated chests, and this was after he teased us with a review of Kids on the Slope that never actually manifested itself.

So I have decided to intrude and make things more interesting. From now on, this blog will switch with another blog randomly. No matter who the reviewer is, they must review the show without skipping a beat.

And that brings us to the show that comes in 4th Place in this season's Anime Survivor, Kokoro Connect. Let's see who shows up to review...

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[Anime Survivor 2] 5th Place - Uta Koi

Vanilla. Mayonaisse. A one-dollar bill. A named background character in a Rumiko Takahashi manga. You're the Nami Hitô of anime.

This feeling of "normal"—this is sadly the feeling I had last season when I had gotten to the midway point of this whole "contest". By getting to the peak of the anime season, you've gotten past the indigestible curd, but you still have a ways to go before dessert is served. I have that exact feeling right now; I haven't the energy to scowl at the middle of the pack, but there's really nothing to praise about the work.

Considering Medaka Box, Mysterious Girlfriend X, and Folktales from Japan parked their Hyundais in a lot full of shiny sports cars and broken-down Edsels, I'm expecting mediocrity at this point. We got it with Moyashimon Returns, and it's likely we'll get it with our fifth place show, Chôyaku Hyakunin Isshû: Uta Koi.

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[Anime Survivor 2] 6th Place - Moyashimon: Reloaded

For the longest time, I had hoped that noitaminA would target the right shows for a sequel. So far, the only sequels have been Honey & Clover (back in 2007, before the first streaming anime shows were screened) and a few follow-ups to Nodame Cantabile. Since 2010, we have had a few two-cours shows, but one of them was Guilty Crown, and I'm pretty sure most of fandom isn't hammering down doors to get that one green-lighted for a return.

There could be many arguments that some don't deserve sequels (No.6, Hataraki Man) and that others would have continuity ruined by a second season (AnoHana, House of Five Leaves), but many could say that shows like Princess Jellyfish, Shiki, Eden of the East, and Fractale Tatami Galaxy are ripe and ready for one. You could say they are practically fermenting in potential.

How appropriate that I mention fermenting. It's just too bad this show wasn't left in the vat for a little longer. Sixth Place in Summer 2012's Anime Survivor is Moyashimon Returns, a noitaminA show that didn't deserve a half-hearted attempt at a sequel.

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[Anime Survivor 2] 7th Place: Tari Tari

I will be one of the few that will admit the luster wore off Hanasaku Iroha after the first season.

P.A. Works did a wondrous job animating the series, and it felt great to see an anime focus on something closer to the heart of Japanese culture and the whims of society. I think a lot of people take the small tourist-based businesses of Japan for granted when they watch them in an animated form, so it felt good to get a sense of realism surrounding the onsen inns of Japan.

However, that sense of realism seemed to eat at my core like a grater to my inner daikon. As time went on, I found myself disliking the false disconnect between the "realism" of an animated show and my own. I couldn't find myself accepting the characters as real people, and some of their personalities got under my skin. If anything, I found myself appreciating the stern leadership from Sui, the inn's matriarch, more than the bubbly effervescence of the shiny-skinned youths working at the inn.

When I learned that P.A. Works was going to release a show that had that same sort of feel and animation, I wondered if I'd be able to stand the characters, now that a connection was made to Hanasaku Iroha. I suppose that's a reason why 7th Place for this season's Anime Survivor goes to Tari Tari.

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[Anime Survivor 2] 8th Place: Total Eclipse (a.k.a. What Hath Shirow Wrought?)

One of the first titles that rooted me in anime and manga (and eventually reviewing) was Masamune Shirow's Appleseed for two very different reasons.

When I bought the compiled manga volumes from Dark Horse Comics, I wasn't exactly sure what kind of manga I liked. I was partial to Rumiko Takahashi's works, but mecha hadn't thrilled me that much. Voltron had caught me as a kid, but I never got into Macross and Gundam (as much of a sin that might be to some). Bubblegum Crisis didn't catch me right away, as it was still an expensive get. When I opened the pages to Appleseed, I finally got the picture. Machinery was cool, especially if there was an underlying point to all of this technology. The translation was complex, and the conversation was foreign enough for me to get lost in the electric traffic jam that Olympus brought with it.

Of course, then I saw the digital wreckage that the OAV series spawned. Limp animation was coupled with ham actors, and all of the philosophy and mechanical jargon were stripped to leave the beat-up heart of a jalopy. It was then that I discovered the power of a good mecha show—a good distribution of detailed technology, deep thoughts, and even a svelte body sliding into the mechanical shell was what made a good mecha show to me.

Well, it looks like we found a show that left just that last part. 8th Place goes to Muv-Luv Alternative: Total Eclipse.

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[Anime Survivor 2] Nobuna Oda (a.k.a. Desperately Seeking Shôgun)

From now on, we're through with the whole "survival" angle.

Really, this season feels like "survival" applies more to the viewers than the actual shows themselves. Shows like Dakara Boku wa H ga Dekinai will be there when the season ends, but our resolve to endure all the harem shows absent from Spring 2012 won't be there. Many have already tapped out from the Boston Crab that the second season of Horizon on the Middle of Nowhere slapped on us. Those who have survived that wringer just for the sake of a happy ending in Natsuyuki Rendezvous will have to gut this one out.

That being said, it's going to be much more difficult this time around to get to the cream of this crop, but one thing still applies—a show that involves a gender-swapped ruler of Japan from the past can never be seen as a truly noteworthy accomplishment.

Ninth place in Summer 2012's Anime Survivor is The Ambition of Nobuna Oda.

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[Anime Survivor 2] 10th Place: Arcana Famiglia

Now that our second Anime Survivor is underway (the first having contributed heavily to a desire to eat whitefish and a staggering fear of owls), I can honestly say that I have no idea what show will wear the heavy crown this time around. There are a handful that may make it to the finals, but I can't guess which would make it to the top. Perhaps this is a sign that I randomly chose all the good anime shows (or all the bad ones) for this contest.

In analyzing the other shows at their face value, I'd say that we're in for crazy weather. It seems that the bountiful harvest from spring (Kids on the Slope, Tsuritama, Fujiko Mine, and the close of Fate/Zero) has dried up into a dustbowl of barren choices. Again, I blame the lack of relief on the immense gains usually left for the equinoxes—Summer and Winter just aren't for fans.

That being said, I'm going to try to remain optimistic. There is still a chance we found some roses growing among the thorns. That's not to say that it's impossible to pluck the stinkweed from the bouquet. And La storia della Arcana Famiglia is a story in desperate need of some Prada perfume.

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Summer 2012's Anime Survivor (Live From Otakon!*)

Hello from Otakon 2012! AniMaybe is having a great time in Baltimore! We're partying with cosplayers and attending all the big panels and industry announcements and glowstick-glowstick-glowstick dacing at raves and

Yeah, yeah. That's all one big fat lie.

Hardy har, Geoff. Joke's on you. Everyone and their tsundere sister is having more fun without you at Otakon, while you're stuck back home with your work and lack of a decent personal budget.

Fine. You know what? I am totally prepared to have fun without you guys. Screw y'all and your collective Haruhi dances. I'm going to have just as good a time partying with Crunchyroll and Funimation during...

Summer 2012's Anime Survivor!

(Oh. That's right. Everyone's at Otakon, so the announcement loses its punch.)

No matter! I'm going to run my own panel from the solitude of my apartment called "Geoff Tebbetts Actually Liked Hand Maid May: My Year With A Tsutaya Records Rental Card"! Just go ahead and party with the bigwigs from ANN! I'll be fine by myself!

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Top 25 Ending Themes of Spring 2012

It took me a few minutes to get myself together for the 25 Best Endings to Spring 2012's anime season. By the time I was done a few hours later, I liked only one of the positions, and that was naturally the top spot.

So to hell with keeping it a secret until the end—I loved the music in Kids on the Slope, and its ending was naturally the best and only one I wouldn't change. Hell, I may end up building my own soundtrack from the jazz greats that appeared in the show.

I will say one thing about the endings this season—I was severely disappointed. In a way, I put a positive spin on that statement, as there was so much that was good about Spring 2012 that there was very little to find flawed in general. Therefore, by default, the endings get my scorn, as I really only liked about ten of them.

So perhaps we should guess to see which one I didn't like at all? Come on. Guess. Betcha you get it right.

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Anime Survivor: Spring '12 - Second Place!

It feels almost inevitable that the final act during this Anime Survivor experiment would be between two shows that know how to use a squirt gun.

The tale of the tape in this last showdown couldn't be any more lopsided. Tsuritama is vibrant in both atmosphere and appearance, its characters rarely frowning, even in defeat or the midst of an oncoming natural disaster. Meanwhile, the Fujiko Mine animation is almost too dark for its traditionally-comedic roots, the improbable stunts by the Lupin the Third cast marred by Fujiko's tormented beginnings.

It's interesting that the squirt gun itself in one show is a portal displaying the other show's general vibe. An unexpected comedy relief in The Woman Called Fujiko Mine, yet an actual device that could be dangerous in the wrong hands in Tsuritama, the water pistol is pretty much the central device in this spring. It seems we'd need something to cool down an anime season that's been hotter than most in recent memory.

Enough of the chit-chat. That makes the announcement anticlimactic. The fifteenth show to be eliminated from Anime Survivor and this season's runner-up is...

(And yes, there are some spoilers ahead...)

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Anime Survivor: Spring '12 - Week 8.2

It's about time to start planning out Summer 2012's Anime Survivor, but stock futures show that this might be a market primed for bear. Normally, that would be terrific, considering just how fun watching Polar Bear, Grizzly Bear and Panda this season, but we're talking the negative, losing-your-life-savings sort of bear. Crunchyroll has announced their first threesome (Nobuna Oda, Total Eclipse, and YuruYuri 2: Erekutoriku Bûgaru), and they all seem to have the inviting charm of a poison toad.

That likely means all three are already on board, just in time for me to push them off the plank.

After already claiming Kingdom, Funimation will grab Moyashimon 2 and maybe a panty-flasher like Dakara Boku ga H Dekinai, while Crunchyroll loads up on Natsuyuki Rendezvous, Tari Tari, Love, Election & Chocolate, Aruvu Rezuru, Ebiten, and Humanity Has Declined. Viz takes on the next Rinne no Lagrange season and contnues Accel World, while Kokoro Connect is lost once Sentai Filmworks grabs the rights.

But were all about the here and now. Three shows left. All are good, but one's got to hit the road.

The fourteenth show gone from this season's Anime Survivor is...

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Anime Survivor: Spring '12 - Week 8.1

Let's face it, guys—if you had an awesome animal in your anime this season, your show was bound to make it to the semifinals of Anime Survivor.

Whether it's cooler-than-advertised Anteater from Polar Bear's Cafe, leader-by-default Tapioca from Tsuritama, the adorably-dumb Apo from Space Brothers, or even the parliament of owl-headed goons from The Woman Called Fujiko Mine (yes, a group of owls is called a "parliament"!)—everywhere you looked, BOSS ANIMALS.

So which one is lowest on the food chain? The thirteenth show to be sent to the glue factory in Spring 2012's Anime Survivor is...!

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Best Opening Themes of Spring 2012

HOORAY! THE MUSIC GOT BETTER!

Well, I suppose everything generally got better this season. Last season's ugly opening-theme performance aside, there were just too many good shows in Spring of 2012 to screw up the OPs for the second season in a row. Even with the passing of the Gintama' anime, there was a lot to choose for musical services, and a lot of opening animations were nice to watch.

So just sit back and listen to the dulcet tones of Mutta Nanba(?) as we count down the Top 25 Opening Themes (and the Worst One) for Spring 2012.

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Anime Survivor: Spring '12 - Week 7.2

Sorry about the wait, folks, but you don't know how agonizing this last choice was. I had a eulogy written for both Polar Bear's Cafe and Kuroko's Basketball this week before my bed made me sick.

That's right. My BED. Apparently the thing's so ridden with allergens that my throat darned closed up on me. A shot in the hip (read: a shot in the ass) of steroids and a truckload of Allegra-D later, and I'm almost 100%. Just need a new mattress now.

Back to the story at hand. Let's face it; the top three seeds have been set in stone for weeks. Tsuritama has made a horse-race out of the noitaminA time slot, Space Brothers has been quiet and diligent in its story, while Fujiko Mine is somehow related to an owl (which might explain the hooters). Whatever. What matters is that there needs to be a fourth in the Final Four.

The twelveth twelvth 12th show eliminated from Spring 2012's Anime Survivor is...

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Anime Survivor: Spring '12 - Week 7.1

I don't have any good explanations why Accel World lasted so long. Perhaps there was a glimmer of hope in it becoming something more than a game and a bit of intrigue in Haru's character, especially with some clear lines drawn in the love polygons, but those of you who know me know I have a procrastinating side. I probably didn't feel the pressure to vote it out until it lasted further than expected.

Besides, I hated Haru's "cousin". Such a horrible attempt to introduce a new character.

That being said, the first to go in this week's Anime Survivor isn't that hard of a choice. Overwhelmingly, eleven out of twelve voters stuffed the ballot box with this show. Did I not pull the plug on this show soon enough?

The eleventh show to be cast from Spring 2012's Anime Survivor is...

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